I am so pissed at some Muslims!!

Yes, coming from a Muslim and I dont care if anyone wants to shoot me for this.
You see, my nephew is studing in St Patricks and he recently received a donation card from the school. So, he went to ask around for some donations and some sickening people told him they are not going to donate to his school coz they dont want to be questioned by God after they die.
My nephew was so embarrassed and now, he had refused to go around collecting donation. He called me at work and told me what happened and said that in fact, many of his current friends' mothers had told them not to befriend him because he is studying in a Catholic school.
They are so shallow-minded!! Dont they know that these Catholics school happen to be an advocate to religious tolerance and they even ensure that the Muslim boys are let off early to be able to perform the Friday prayers? In fact, during the orientation camp, a special room was given to the Muslim boys to perform their obligatory prayers. They even have a few Muslim teachers who wear the headscarves and if they are so anal abt their Catholic faith, then do you think they will even take in Muslim boys.
I chose this school for my nephew because I wanted him to improve his English language and break away from his current group of friends. My nephew is happy at this school because the teachers are so involved and their activities are to his liking.
I feel like killing one of the mothers who even commented about me who should know more than allow my nephew to study in a Catholic school since I am working for a mosque.
Arrghhh...so sorry, just wanna get this off my chest. *Zahra who is still fuming mad*

PrisonPete

Have you guys ever gone into PrisonPete's blog? I read the blog whenever I find time. Gosh, I really admire the amount of work the editor put in to type all the letters that he received from Pete.
I am amazed at the time Pete spent in jail writing about his accounts and daily routine. Wish that he could delve more into his feelings and his crime but I guess there are just some things in life that you'd rather hide in the closet and I have to respect that, as much as I like to know.
Do pay him a visit, it's an interesting read, very different.

Check out my button!!

Yaay!! I've got a button too!! Jin did it for me. It's so pretty, isnt it? Thank you so much Jin, love ya!!



By the way, the spouse finally had some time to look through my blog and he said said that my layout is EXTREMELY BORING and looks dead!! Sob!! Sob!!
On a lighter note, he promised that he will spice it up for me but he cant tell me when. Knowing him, it may take months but still better than nothing.

Otherwise, I may just take up some crash course and try to do this all by myself. It's hard but no harm trying, just hope that I dont mess up the whole thing, haha!!

Anyway, have a good weekend everyone!! I know that mine has started off well. Thanks to Jin!! :)

How to teach them the time?

It's really hard teaching the kids the time. Can someone pls tell me how you guys do it?
Naseer argued with me that after 4pm, it should be 5pm and there is no such thing as 4.05, 4.15, 4.30. It just did not make sense to him. I had to go into details and explain about 60 minutes making an hour but it still does not make sense to him. I think it's me, I am just so bad at explaining things that I tend to confuse them more than make them understand. Anyway, here's the conversation we just had on the phone barely 5 minutes back.

Naseer : Hi mom, what time does Powerpuff Girl start?
Me : 5pm.
Naseer : What time is it now?
Me : 4.15.
Naseer : No, it's 4 right?
Me : It was 4. Now it's 4.15.
Naseer : There is no such thing as 4.15. If Powerpuff Girl starts at 5, then it must be 4 now.
Me : Well, when it comes to time, it's not as simple as that.
Naseer : No, I learnt in school, after 4 is 5.
Me : Yeah but that is numbers. For time, there are 60 minutes to make an hour and so after 4pm, it's 4.01pm, then 4.02pm, then 4.03pm, then....
Naseer : You are of no use. You are just confusing me. Nevermind, I'll call Daddy. He knows better. Bye Mom.

So, I am confusing him. I am of no use. Daddy is better. Let's see. I'll keep you guys informed in case the phone rings in the next few minutes. If it is not Naseer, then it must be his Daddy. Hee hee.

The best things in life are FREE!!

Yup!! That's so true. Just imagine buying a plate of noodles with your own dollars and it tasted yucky and you go complaining how you had wasted 3 bucks on a totally tasteless noodles. What if it was a treat instead? Hmmm....not too bad, at least it didnt cost me a single cent.
Well, I will list 5 things that make me so happy and it did not even cost me a cent.

1) When the spouse decides to spend the morning having a short walk with me to the train station and send me off to work instead of us rushing off in a cab together.

2) When Naseer, Feroz and Zaza made a simple birthday card with a piece of paper and drew a beautiful me (ok, not so beautiful) and stick a half eaten sweet on the card for me instead of buying one.

3) When I decided to fry french fries, hotdogs and nuggets for a hot cuddly meal at home with the family instead of calling the spouse to get takeaways, that make the spouse very happy.

4) When I reached home and all three kids rushed out of the house to give me a hug, shouting "Yaay!! Mommy is home!!" and the next door neighbour came back from work and commented, "You must be a great mom, they love you so much!!"

5) When the spouse reach home early from work and we all sit down and watched a rented vcd together eating chips and drinking milk. All together. That moment is irreplaceable.

Simple things in life that do not cost a cent and yet makes me so happy. There are so many other moments that makes me smile and think how lucky I am but I have listed just 5 because these things happen so often and yet never fail to put a smile on my face. Care to share your happy moments?

Doctor, doctor, wherefore art thou?

My mom was suddenly taken ill last night and we needed a doctor so badly to do a housecall since she was feeling too weak and could hardly walk. I called our family doctor (his clinic is just under the block in front of our flat) who turned us down flatly.
Then a call was made to another doctor just down the street and again, we were turned down. At last, I remembered Dr Shahi who did such a good job with the kids when we were staying with in laws and he agreed to come. We called him at 9.30pm and he came around 11.40pm, right after his clinic ended. I was ever so grateful. My mom is now fine.
I think she was too tired thus the sudden dizziness followed by a bout of vomiting.
Her urine is fine, her sugar level is good and her pressure is perfect. I was getting so worried because she kept getting this like every once a month and I thought it could be my kids overworking her.
Oh yes, our maid application is approved and I am so happy coz that means, mom will be getting an extra help in the kitchen soon.
By the way, I missed Desperate Housewives last night. Sad right??

Ooooh...cheap thrill!!

Ok, here's another one of those embarrassing moments.
I was on my way to run some errand for my mom at City Hall and had to drop by one of the shops to get a gift for a friend as well. I was like cramming my time to do so many things. Had a hot date that same night and after dinner, my date and I would be joining some friends in Boom Boom Room. My mom dropped me at the taxi stand while she waited in the car for me to go get her stuff. I was in a red wraparound top with a mini black short skirt. Actually, it was a tube top which, in my moment of folly and with a little of itchy backside, I decided to switch it to a micro-mini skirt. I went into the mall, took the escalator and started running up to save time. In my haste, I did not realise the back of my skirt was riding up my thighs and up my bums. I heard some whistling and turned to look at 2 guys whose head were touching the steps of the elevator just to get a peek of my panty. I quickly pulled down my skirt, and with my hands still tugging at the hem, I made a dash up, got one leg caught in the other and fell flat on my front. The guys were to slow to react and they piled on top of me.
It was so embarrassing!! I was in my heels, thinking I looked like a hottie and I had to fall flat. To add insult to injury, the 2 guys had to fall on me and caused a human traffic right there at the top of the escalator.
I quickly got up, after they lifted themselves from me, and without turning back, quickly dashed away.
After getting my mom's stuff, I walked to the lift, too embarrassed to take the same route I came from, only to bump into the 2 idiots again in the lift. They smiled at me and one of them dropped a note with his number.
Here's what the note says, "Hi there, I am Bryan. I won the bet!! I knew it was a black panty. Care to share my winnings?"
I really wished there was a blackout then so that I could perform a mass murder in the lift.

Desperate Housewives

Yo Steph and Ginger, Desperate Housewives is premiering on Singapore tv on MOnday at 10pm. I cant wait for it. Been reading so much on Steph's and Ginger's blogs that I found myself getting hooked even before watching it.
And, by the way, I love Teri Hatcher!! Just got to watch it!!

Baaah!!

Sometimes, I think my mom is not very smart. She is quite a pleaser and cant say no for an answer whenever someone asked her for favours.
You see, my mom is not an Arab. My dad is and so are the rest of the women who married into his family. You know how these Singaporean Arabs walk around with a chip on their shoulder and look down on the other races.
That's one reason why I never choose to marry an Arab man. They are pompous, rich because they take over family business (read : bloody lazy) and sickeningly irritating.
The women are the same. Even worse. They will talk and befriend you only when there is noone else in the room and if another Arab woman step in, you are invisible.
Well, anyway, I am not happy with what happened at my uncle's funeral. My mom was there and not a single soul spoke to her. Ok, I know, it's a sad occasion but my mom is their sister in law for God's sake. Dont tell me you cant even acknowledge her presence??!!
Nevermind, I was cheesed off when they asked her to cook for them. Yeah, COOK FOR THEM!!
A bloody big pot of assam pedas and another bloody big pot of gado-gado!!
And my dear sweet old mom said yes!! Can you believe that?
Those hypocrites who did not even bother to visit my parents during Eid, who's got bloody cow sense and no manners or whatsoever to even say hi to my mom when they bump into her and my mom said ok, she'll cook for them.
I am so damn pissed!!
I really wish that my mom is not so nice as to help these people because they dont deserve kindness and since they claim that they are so bloody rich, go and use their bloody money to order food instead of asking my mom to go to the market, spend her hard-earned cash on ingredients to cook food for them.
They just dont deserve it!!
Sickening assholes!!

My mom's ex-helper.

I had not intended to write about her but then, today, I found out something totally disgusting and I just had to write about her.
My mom took her as a helper in October 2002. It's quite the norm here to employ maids from the neighbouring countries. They are mostly from the Philippines and Indonesia, while the minority are from Sri Lanka, Burma, Myanmar and India. Our helper was from Indonesia, a sweet young thing at 21 when she first came here. Before that, our helper of 7 years, also from Indonesia, decided to leave because she wanted to get married.
So, we took in a new helper.
Wow!! She really blew us away. She came with headscarf and was always in time for her prayers. Her work was good. She was very clean and meticulous. She worked from 6am right till 9.30pm, even though we told her to stop.
Then , slowly things started to disappear. Not expensive things, just simple things like milk bottles, the tv remote control, some small toys etc. We were puzzled. Of course, being the tyrant he was (and still is), Feroz was often accused of throwing things down the block. I believed that it could be him until one night where I happened to wake up around 2am, went out from the room and I saw Naseer's milk bottle on the floor. I was too sleepy to wash it, so I just took it and placed it on the sofa. The next morning, the bottle was missing. I asked her about it and she said she did not see it. I was quite pissed because it was totally gone just like that. We searched the whole house.It was really impossible for Feroz to throw it because he was asleep when I placed it on the sofa at 2am and I was the second person to be up that morning, you know who was the first, and the first thing I did was to look for the bottle. I was quite sure that she had discarded it. I was so pissed but because she was helping me take care of the kids when I had to run some errands and I was worried that she might take it on the kids, I decided to let the matter rest.
It was only a few months later that she admitted having thrown all those items lying around just to teach us to be more careful about our stuff. Well, my mom did question her if she was paying us a salary or the other way round.
Anyway, her work was still good.
Then, she asked my dad for an off day. We gave it to her, she needed a break too and we really did not mind her taking off on a Sunday once a month.
She became pretty bold and her off days became more frequent , once every 2 weeks. So, on some months, she would have 2 off days. That was not a big issue to us, as long as she continued working well.
Then she got herself a boyfriend, boasted about it to us. No big deal, right? We just advised her to be careful since some Singaporean men really like to prey on maids just so that there will be no strings attached. She also told us proudly that he was a married man. I was disgusted but I did not say anything. It was her life and I did not think that anything I'd say or do would make a difference to her, so I chose not to say anything at all.
Shortly, we started getting calls in the middle of the night. Threatening calls saying things like "Leave my hubby alone or I'll get someone to beat you up." Something to that effect. After a few days, the calls stopped. Even though we suspected her, we did not make a big issue out of it. We just questioned her and told her to be more careful when choosing friends.
Despite all that, we still had a good relationship. We could sit and chat about anything under the sun. She was a smart girl and she actually took up a side-line by selling second-hand handphones to other maids around our area. She made quite a lot of money being the "middle-man" and would tell my mom and I whenever she closed a deal.
Then, her 2 years contract was up. She told us that she wanted to go back to Indonesia for good. We were quite disappointed. My dad persuaded her to stay and promised her an increment in pay. She was happy about the increment and she told my dad that she would only renew her contract for another year but she wanted to go back to Indonesia for 3weeks. We were fine with that.
She was quite independent. She went to the airport and came back on her own. Well, not actually on her own, her boyfriend was her driver to and fro.
Then in December, she had a small argument with my mom. Frankly, I dont think that it was a big thing. Just my mom asking why were things always going missing whenever she was in Malaysia visiting my sis. She got offended and said that my mom was accusing her. She then immediately told my mom that she wanted to resign by the end of December.
We did not stop her. We decided to let her go. Although we knew that it would be really taxing without a helper, especially for my parents since they are old, we felt that enough was enough. I told my mom that we could take another helper. I just felt that this girl had taken advantage of my parents. I just wanted her to go. So, we told her fine, we'd arrange for her to leave Singapore within 7 days. We cancelled her work permit and bought her tickets to Batam.
A few nights before she left, the spouse smelt ciggy smoke coming from her room. I told him to ignore it. The next day, she carelessly left her bag hanging behind the door unlatched. The hook gave way and the bag dropped on the floor. The contents spilled out. There was a pack of cigarette with lighter, 3 x-rated vcds with pictures of naked women and men making out and a hotel accommodation bill. I was too scared to look through her things. I had never liked looking through others' things before, so I just stuffed everything back into the bag and told her to keep her things elsewhere.
Then, her handphone rang and she was talking on the phone within my mom's earshot. She was crying and saying things like only once and it happened.
Well, you guessed right. She was pregnant, so she had to leave Singapore no matter what.
The night before she left, she cried and told my mom that she was scared. But seriously what can we do. She was 23 and definitely capable of thinking right. Did she really think the married man will keep her, support her and her child?
The day after she left, a letter came for her. It was from that guy, saying things like he did not believe the child was his and that she was cheap, going out with many other men other than himself.
Hmm.....well, I guess it was a good thing that she left.
I just hope that she is coping well if she really decides to keep the baby.
Well, she really learnt her lesson the hard way. ...sigh.

When death hits home

Yesterday evening, my uncle passed away.
He had been unwell over the past few years due to his heart condition. My dad was and still is distraught. He was the only living brother, 4 others passed away many years back.
I feel saddened by the loss. He was a gracious man. He was kind and could be quite a joker at times. Now, he is gone.
Funny how you dont think much of a person until you realise that you will never ever see him again.
May he rest in peace.

Miss, do you want to buy my baby?

A lady just came to the counter and asked me this.
I was quite shocked but she went on saying that she just delivered her baby a month ago and she could not afford to take care or feed the child. Her husband perished in the Aceh tsunami tragedy and she just had no means of supporting the baby on her own.
She showed me some hospital bills that was still outstanding and requested for a loan.
She had not eaten for more than 7 days and her baby who she breastfeeds is not getting enough nutrients fro her weak body. I did not know what to say. I asked for her address and her home number and she refused to give citing that she has no telephone at home and she was all alone.
I doubted her story. I feel that she was just using the tsunami tragedy to make some quick bucks.
You see, this lady is not that young. She is well into her fifties and I just could not believe that she had just delivered a baby. Moreover, her hospital bill said outpatient charges and cost only $95. If it was a delivery charge, would'nt she be admitted? No?
Hmm.....and if she was all alone with nobody, where is the baby?
I wonder.....

Excuse me Miss, your lips is bleeding.

During my pre-hejab days, I loved to wear skirts, you know, those stretchable t-shirt material mini-skirts ala Tina Turner style. I'd usually wear that with a tight tank-top or a tube with baggy shirt over it.
I had one light grey skirt with white prints that I loved so much and I used to wear so often.
Anyway, one day, after my aerobics, I went out to have a quick bite at the nearby Macdonalds with the spouse, who was then my boyfriend. As I was walking, a guy came up to me and told me, "Excuse me Miss, your lips is bleeding."
I reached out for a tissue in my bag and started to dab my lips, but it was dry. I thought that the blood must have caked on my lips, so I took out a tiny mirror and checked myself. There was no blood. I was pissed. That guy must have pulled some stunt on me.
So I went on to Macs to meet the spouse. We had a quick bite coz we were going to catch a movie and when I got up to carry my bag, he tugged my sleeves and told me, "I think your menses came." I turned, looked down on my favorite skirt and saw a red spot smiling brightly at me.
I turned red and told him about my encounter with the guy. I was so embarrassed. The spouse offered to get me another skirt while I went to the toilet to wash up.
Sheesh.....what a way to tell a girl that her menses had stained her skirt. Please guys, if you see a Japanese flag on some girl's skirt, just tell her as it is ok. At this point of time, it really does not help to be discreet. Really!!

Insensitivity

Yesterday evening, around 6pm, Singapore had a memorial service for the victims of the tsunami. It was a sombre and sad event. We had more than 5000 people streaming through the Singapore Expo Hall to pay their respects and we had religious leaders from nine different faiths leading prayers, each in their own way.
A siren rang through the whole of Singapore to mark a minute of silence around 6pm (but I did not hear it over at my side) and most people, moist-eyed, dropped everything and stood in silence for about 20 seconds. That may not be enough to remember the victims by but sudden loss of lives like that deserve some form of remembrance or other.
At that point of time the phone rang, and it was a relative whom was on my "best to avoid" list wishing to speak to my dad. Of course, dad was not in and she rattled on anyway asking how we were, what we were doing etc, etc. I gave her one-word answers hoping that she get the message but no, so she asked what I was doing. I told her I was watching the memorial service on tv and she said.
"Why waste your time watching such shows? It's no big deal what. Everyone of us will die one day. This is just one of the way people go."
I told her that it was a disaster and so many people lost their lives, some lost their families, homes and possession and that one out of three of the victims are small children, which made it more heart-breaking than anything else.
Her answer."So what? Does that mean I have to drop everything I do just because there was a disaster? Life goes on you know. Must I go into mourning for weeks just because many people died. Anyway, this did not touch me at all. I dont know anyone who died there."
That striked me. Do you have to know the victims to feel the loss?
This tragedy took so many lives and though I did not know anyone personally, I felt sad that many were dead prematurely and a tear or two dropped when I saw pictures of the dead and videos of the disaster.
I should think that there is that little spot in us that made us feel so small over incidents like this, and compassionate towards our fellow humans.
Well, obviously, this does not apply to this relation of mine.
Do we really have to wait for disaster to strike home before we could hold our hands together and pray for the victims?
After all, this is a disaster of the nation and Singapore was saved from this disaster only because of our geographical location. What if the neighbouring countries were not around to shelter us?
Then, will that relation of mine feel the same way? I dont think so.

School is Forgettable!!

That was what Naseer told me when I asked him about his new school.
He and Feroz started their term at the new school on Monday and both of them like this new school a lot. Must be because of the shorter hours and they dont have to lug big school bags to school. They just come in their uniforms and their new Spiderman water bottles each.
However, Feroz has been sick and did not attend school on Tuesday and Wednesday so Naseer was pretty much on his own on both these days. So I asked him last night,
"So, do you like school?"
"Yup, it's a great school."
"What did you do today in school?"
"I dont know."
"What do you mean you dont know. You were there for four hours."
"I forgot."
"How could you forget? You are only 4, coming to 5, you have no excuse to be forgetful."
"Well, I cant help it. This school is forgettable."
"Huh, what do you mean forgettable?"
"It's not like Daddy Day Care. Where you get to eat chocolates during the break, where you get to bring your pet to school, where you get to chase the teachers and play puppet game. If you had sent me to a school like Daddy Day Care, I will remember everything I did in school."

Yes, I only have myself to blame. Too much tv is definitely a no-no to kids his age. *roll eyes*

T'is

A year has passed just like that. What have I accomplished? Nothing at all but it does not set me back like it used to. I guess I have lost that need to be able to live up to my resolution and just take things as it come. I just dont feel like I need to accomplish anything anymore. Loser? Maybe..but more tired to think and regret I guess.
Anyway, I remembered the time when I felt so depressed in the hospital after delivering Feroz. It did not help that I was placed in a C-Class ward together with plenty of mommies who were holding their healthy and pink babies. My curtains were drawn closed half the time and I refused to budge from my bed unless someone came to visit.
Well, I made friend with a lady who soon came to the bed next to mine. We only started talking when she woke up the next day with blood all over her white clean sheet. I was so shocked. She was only 5 1/2 months pregnant then and bleeding profusely. Anyway, her tummy was really huge and I thought that she was going to deliver but she told me her problem. She had a growth right next to her ovaries and it was as huge as a rugby ball. Her pregnancy was really difficult and the doctors could not do any real test because they were afraid that it would affect her baby.
Anyway, she had been bleeding throughout the pregnancy and had been in and out of hospital since she discovered the growth soon after knowing that she was pregnant.
We made friends and talked a bit. She had to deliver her baby as soon as she reached 34weeks via caesarean and an operation would be performed as well to get rid of the growth as well as her ovaries. This meant that she could only have one child and so, she was really afraid that she might lose the baby she was carrying.
We talked a bit and soon it was time for me to be discharged. I remembered her and another lady opposite my bed because she also delivered her baby prematurely.
After I was discharged, I had to make daily trips to the hospital to the NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) to visit Feroz. It was painful at first but slowly I grew to accept and I was pretty sure that Feroz would survive and fight on.
2 months later, I met this same lady in the NICU. It seemed that she had delivered her baby and her baby was healthy. She had her growth and ovaries removed and was thriving.
We talked a bit and she was so happy. I remembered her daughter's name, a very pretty name, Erika Natasha. I was glad to know that she was healthy and everything was fine.
Last week, I bumped into the lady who was at the opposite bed, we chatted for a while and she told me that Erika's mom passed away in January 2003. I was so shocked. Erika was only 2 years old then. It seemed that her growth was actually a cancer tumour and she knew right from the start that she only had 2 years to live. She had to go for chemotherapy and radiation after she delivered Erika and she was really fighting for her life. She had wanted to live for Erika and watched her grow up. But she only had 2 years with her daughter.
I felt really sad about this. Even though she was just an acquaintance, that short time spent with her did make me reflect on how much time I really have with my kids.
At times, we just forget how short life is and take things for granted.
Today, I woke up and looked at my children and realised how lucky I am to be able to open my eyes and spend another day with them.
But, I cant really tell if I am going to live long enough to be able to forever watch them monkey around, grow up, find a partner and finally have their own family and lead their own life.
I wish I could but again it's really not up to me.